I’m mildly obsessed with Saint James Park. On a clear, sunny, (un)London day, you’ll always find me there. And that’s exactly where he did, on the afternoon of April 21. at appoximately 1300 hours. in broad daylight.
The crime scene.
I was having lunch at the crime scene, enjoying a nice turkey melt and drinking Oasis, the British equivalent of kool-aid (as you would expect). As I sat at a bench (with the drink at my feet), I thought my biggest threat was the duck inching closer for some bread.
I was wrong.
The item.
A ragged man made his way down the path, staggering and murmuring. As he walked by, he casually dropped a pence in front of me…and in one sweeping motion, he picked up his coin. and my Oasis.
He stole my drink! The man kept a slow, steady stagger, with my half-full bottle in hand (or half-empty for you pessimists). The bankers beside me just stared incredulously. I sat, stunned, and let out a shout, Hey!
When the choice came between fight or flight, I apparently chose (a bemused) frozen. But before I could rise, a plain clothes police officer appeared! The bobbyless bobby stopped the hobo dead in his tracks and saved the day.
Cornered, the thief threw my Oasis into the pond.
The officer forced the man to return, apologize, and pay me back. The man offered a handful of pence coins, but I refused. After all, today’s lunchtime experience was nothing short of priceless.
That is absolutely hilarious. Who knew people stole beverages from right at your feet?
That’s freakin’ awesome.
-patrick
well someone on this blog is HOT, but we won’t name names. i can’t believe the dude would steal something–it’s not even alcoholic! ~joe
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